You watched me die.

my tears could never make you understand

the terrors in my head are mine to bare

this never even had a chance

and the only way out is the end

 

the moodswings and rage episodes

oh, they could never bring you close

because the only ones who truly get it

are the ones who go through that

 

I needed a safe space, somewhere to breathe

you filled the room with smoke and told me to be free

you are just as damaged as I am

the only difference is I know how to understand

 

from fire to ashes, to fire again

life can change without any plans

you make me choke on my own blood

for this I knew I'd never be enough

 

you wanted peace, lightness and clarity

and you said that to the dark monster that became me

you could never love me as I am

and that is why this must end

 

you couldn't walk through the flames

you couldn't help the fire out

all you could do was stare

while the life left my body

 

and you stood there, not moving

watching the sparkle leave my eyes

far enough for me to feel alone

and close enough to watch me die.